Sadly this week I’ve been really low on the emotional energy front which is common for people with ADHD. We either have too much energy that comes out as overexcitement or too little energy which means we lose a lot of motivation. There doesn’t seem to be much in between.
Yet, because of the low emotionally energy I’ve had, I’ve been doing some reflection about the people around me and their place in my life. The thing is when you’ve only got so much energy to give, it makes you really think about where you want it to go.
Wait, what do I mean by energy? Well everybody has their own energy which consists of their time, physical effort, and emotions. Each person chooses how to use their they do this by giving their time and emotions to someone or some What they put these things into is a really important thing.
We ADHDers struggle with our physical and personally boundaries, most of the time we’re people pleasers who will say or do anything to just make people happy. While this can be great in small doses, ultimately it can drain us if we’re not get anything back. Some people or things, we can put our energy into things, and they excite us which results in us being re-energised. However, then there are times when we put our energy into things that serve us no purpose and that we get nothing back from.
“You create the way people respect you and how you respect yourself by being careful with where you distribute your energy.”
ADHD gIRL
Obviously there are some things we are obligated to do so we put our energy into them without expecting to get anything back, things such as parenting, good deeds etc.. However, we currently live in a society which is largely take take take without giving anything back. With that in mind we’ve got to be careful what we pour our energy in time.
Of course there is a time and place for doing good deeds, giving something back, fulfilling obligations and everything like that, but we’ve also got to look after ourselves, and one of the ways we can do that is distributing our energy carefully. This can actually be simplified into a very simple thing, putting our boundaries in place.
Unfortunately, putting boundaries in place aren’t that simple for ADHD and it’s something I think we do get better at with age and experience, because we get sick of pouring our energy into things and people who just don’t seem to do anything better.
Let me tell you though; your energy is extremely precious because with ADHD it varies a lot more than other peoples, so try not to put it in the wrong place you’ll constantly be defeated or exhausted.
Till next time ADHDers and allies!
