When I was younger, I hated being on Ritalin because it made me feel like a zombie, devoid of personality. The sad truth is that having ADHD can turn you into a kind of zombie anyway. Not in the way that it robs you of personality, but it does affect your motivation levels.
I’m not sure if it’s the ADHD itself or years of being made to feel like you can’t do anything right which causes this lack of motivation, but the fact remains that a lot of the time people with ADHD struggle to get stuff done. Of course, they may start something with the best intentions, but then frustration and distraction leads them to either just up or make false promises of finishing it another time.
“With ADHD, there is no pretence.”
ADHD Girl
ADHD is definitely an all or nothing condition, we’re either going after our passions at 100mph whole heartedly, or we’re just not doing it; it’s that simple. With ADHD, there is no pretence, we can’t do something we are not passionate about, at least not as easily as most people can at any rate.
That’s why I keep myself as busy as possible doing lots of different things. I spend most of my time running after the children who live in my house, but when they are at school (or at the local play centre) I am either writing, volunteering, going to the gym, working or tidying. If I wasn’t so busy I would be doing nothing and while that sounds nice to many people in theory; it does get tedious after the novelty wears off.
I’d rather be doing everything than doing nothing, so I basically just keep going at 100mph until I crash and get burnout. It may sound great to some people in terms of being productive, but it’s a wild ride with no let up or rest for the brain. I’d rather be coasting at a nice 50mph, but sadly that’s not how my amazing brain works.
