The really difficult thing about ADHD is that good intentions don’t always lead to good outcomes, and that’s pretty much considered the underlying principle of normal behaviour. Society unfortunately is very wary of anything that falls out side the normal patterns of behaviour, especially if the neurodivergent needs allow them a level of being able to function somewhat effectively in society.
Maybe this is why I’m more intrigued and curious around people’s intentions than their actions. Of course, I’m not saying to dismiss the actions completely because without action there is no proof of intention whatsoever, but unless we understand the intention, how can we understand the person behind the action.
Sadly, as I said society today is more focused on the action/ outcome than it is about anything else, which means intentions often go unnoticed.This is fundamentally why it’s very hard to have ADHD in today’s society.
“So much of the perception of ADHD is linked to our understanding of intentions and behaviour.”
ADHD gIRL
Of course, we could go too much the other way with this as well. We as ADHDers could just say well I had good intentions so my mistakes don’t matter and as long as I have good intentions then I don’t need to change. No, that’s not a particularly healthy mindset to have on any level. It suggests all we are, are victims of our ADHD, but with the right support and the right mindset I believe we can be so much more.
I’ve seen too many sensational headlines lately where ADHD is seemingly used as an excuse to gain money for discrimination, or to justify why people are in jail. While understanding is always encouraged, personal responsibility must also be encouraged because otherwise we just expect the world to work for us instead of being part of it.
“For two communities of people to come together; ADHDers and non-ADHDers, for a better outcome, there needs to be awareness, understanding and willingness on both sides. “
If we want people to work with us, we’ve also got to work with them. It’s the difference between playing the hand you’ve been dealt or just expecting to be handed the game. While winning is always nice, I’d rather win by being a skilled player than by being the one who ended the game early. When I say skilled player, I don’t mean somehow not having ADHD or not struggling, I simply mean growing and changing as much as I can in the best way that I can with the support of those around me.
Just some food for thought, but I think it goes a long way to explaining why ADHD is massively misunderstood in society and also why even though awareness is important, we still never should give up the personal fight too.
Catch you next time on the blog ADHDers and Allies, I don’t always get it right when it comes to positive outcomes where my good intentions are concerned, but I will never stop trying and that makes all the difference.
