Ever had one of those days where you wake up and you feel nothing? No happiness? No sadness….you just are going along with whatever life throws at you but without the complication of feeling anything. It’s almost like you’ve took antidepressants, but you can’t remember taking them, It almost sounds pretty good, right?
Well I can’t stand days like that! I’m having one of those days today! I don’t know what causes it except to say I think my dopamine levels are at good level, probably due to all the sugar I can’t seem to stop eating of late, definitely not a good form of treatment. Anyway, while today it’s in some ways been easy to get stuff done and not be ruled by my emotions, I feel devoid of my personality.
“For some of us being excitable, passionate and loud isn’t just an ADHD trait, but part of our personality.”
ADHD Girl
I’m a bubbly fun creative person, but not on days like today. I feel like I’m walking through my life instead of actually living it, because what is life without emotions? Easier, perhaps! But without feeling sadness, we’d never know what happiness means, without anger there would be no righteous passion and without death there would be no life. Feelings, whether good or bad are part of what it means to be human and I want to feel it all.
So on day like today I just hold on tight and wait it out because I know come tomorrow my emotions will probably be going full throttle again. I suppose some people might enjoy the break, their brain not going at a 1000mph hour, me? I miss the noise because it’s all I’ve ever known and it’s my normal!! and when it’s your normal then everything else seems strange, boring or ordinary….tis the life of an ADHDer!
Take care ADHDers and allies- may your brain ever work in your favour!
